


Captain's Log

by 21derful (EssGee)



Category: The Venture Bros
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Domestic Fluff, Family, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-04-09
Packaged: 2018-06-01 04:57:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6501622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EssGee/pseuds/21derful
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snippets from Pirate Captain's life after going to work for JJ.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Captain's Log

"CAPTAIN, my good man!" The pirate jumped at the sound. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to such a booming voice coming from such a small man.

"Yes! Mister Jonas, sir!" he replied, standing at attention as he turned to face his boss.

"You remember Sally, don't you?" JJ indicated the blonde at his side.

"Aye. From that thar… ALIEN incident." How could he forget? It was only a few weeks ago. And also, somewhat traumatizing. But he supposed he shouldn't be surprised that working for the son of the late great Jonas Venture would come with a few grand and terrifying adventures.

"Super!" said JJ. "Then you'll remember Rocket, too, yes?"

The Captain noticed Sally was indeed holding her little tyke. … Oh no. "...Aaaye?"

"Weeell…" The Captain only half heard the explanation, something about giving Sally a tour of the island, too busy searching for a way to decline the request he knew would come at the end: "Do you think you could watch him for us?"

"I'm not sure-"

"Oh, come now, Captain! It'll only be for an hour or two."

Jonas was smiling in his cheerful way, but Sally seemed less thrilled. "You reeeaally don't have to, if you don't want," she assured him, but there was something in her tone that put him on edge.

JJ confirmed his suspicions as he turned to her. "There's nothing to worry about, Sally. The Captain here is my finest man!"

She grimaced and knelt down, leaning in to say not-quietly-enough, "But isn't he a… you know, a pirate?"

"Ye don't think I can do it!" challenged the Captain.

Sally's skin flashed transparent for a moment as her attention snapped to him, before regaining her composure and opacity. "It's… not THAT, I just…"

"Give 'im here. I've handled worse than a coupla hours o' babysittin'."

Sally looked hesitantly between a reassuring JJ and a resolute Captain. "...I suppose if you're sure…" She hugged Rocket, then handed him off to the Captain.

The baby, some 9 months old, give or take, examined the strange new person holding him. He decided he liked the Captain's sideburns, and reached up to touch them. As touching turned to patting and tugging, the Captain immediately regretted this decision, but it was too late to back out, now.

Sally proceeded to go through her bag, explaining everything Rocket might need in perhaps too much detail for no longer than the Captain would be watching him, yet somehow leaving him still feeling entirely unprepared at the same time.

When she was satisfied, she left the bag with them and leaned in to give Rocket a kiss. "Mommy will be back before you know it, sweetie." As she left with JJ, she called back, "Have fun!" The Captain was pretty sure that meant the baby and not him.

The moment she was out of sight, Rocket seemed to grow confused. When the Captain set him down, he began crawling toward the door, only to be stopped before he could reach it. "Ohhh, no ya don't, little fella. Afraid ye'll be stayin' with ol' Pirate Captain fer a wee bit, here."

The Captain's gut twisted as the babe's eyes began to water, and sure enough, a few moments later, the wailing began.

It was going to be a long two hours…

* * *

 

"Captain, old chum!" Jonas called out.

"Talk to me," the Captain casually replied back.

"I-..." His smile faded, and he averted his gaze a little. "Well I just wanted to apologize again for the other day. I was under a lot of stress, what with the museum and all dad's friends and trying to show off for Rust, but that was no excuse for-"

The Captain's hand quickly flew up in a silencing gesture, and JJ's lips shut tight as he glanced with concern between it and the Captain's face. But the pirate shook his head with a light smile. "Think nothin' of it. Me an' the boys probably overreacted a wee bit, too. But I think it's best we let bygones be bygones."

JJ's face lit- not to his usual exuberant smile, but to something much more content and sincere. "I'm very glad to hear it, Captain." They both knew they'd worked together well enough soon after the incident, and that their little island crew here had become something of a family in recent months. But it was still very appreciated that he was taking the time to make sure. "...Say, do you mind if I join you?" JJ indicated the open beer and the television reruns that had been playing when he'd floated in.

The Captain smiled. "I'll grab yeh a cold one."

For the next hour, the two sat, enjoying the show and each other's company like old friends. It was hard to believe they'd only known each other for about a year.

"...Say, Captain," said JJ at last. "I sort of hate to ask, but I was hoping I might get a favor from you."

A favor, as opposed to a normal request? This oughtta be good. "Depends on what ye be askin'," replied the Captain.

"Wwwwell, I was kind of thinking of taking Sally out for the weekend, somewhere nice, to make it up to her for getting so absorbed in the party, you know?"

"Aye?" Ahh, wait, he could guess where this was going. "I suppose ye be needin' me ta watch the little one, then, eh?"

"Well, Ned offered to do it, actually. But a few days is awfully long. So you won't have to watch Rocket the whole time, but if you could just help him out or give him a break when he needs it? Maybe keep an eye on them, just in case?" Ned really was very doting and pretty good with Rocket, overall, but he could get overwhelmed easily at times, and it didn't hurt to have someone double check now and then in case he forgot anything.

The Captain smiled. "Aye! That sounds mighty doable."

* * *

 

A few days later, the Captain and Ned saw JJ and Sally off. "You two enjoy yer vacation, now!" called the Captain.

"Bye bye!" called Ned.

"Bye bye!" echoed Rocket, in Ned's arms. All three of them waved as the duo boarded the XX-1.

They headed inside, and the Captain helped Ned settle in. "Would ya like me ta get some snacks while ye keep our little man busy?"

Ned, who was now helping Rocket build a block tower, looked up to the Captain for a few seconds before smiling. "Yes please!" He tapped his hands against his knees. "Ned get snack too?"

"Aye! We all could use a nice snack." Looking to Rocket, he asked, "So what'll it be, wee man? D'ya want some crackers?"

Rocket looked up excitedly. "Fishies?"

The Captain laughed softly. "No, I'm afraid we're out of the fishie crackers. We've got the square ones and the circle ones, though." He made shapes with his fingers to indicate each one.

Rocket frowned. "Fishies."

… Oy… "How about some grapes? Or some yuuuummy apple slices?"

"Fishies."

"PB and J."

"No! Fishies!"

"Cookies! Yer mom'll have my hide but I'll break out the-"

"Fishies! Fishies!"

It…. was going to be a very long weekend.

Suddenly, Ned's eyes went wide. "Uh!"

"Hrm?"

"Mm." He had a thought but he couldn't quite find the words. "Fishies. Uh." His hands moved in a way that seemed to be conveying directions, but the Captain wasn't quite sure what they were in relation to. "Ned has…" A few moments later, he made a frustrated gesture and jumped to his feet, racing out of the room.

"... All right then." The Captain continued to try reasoning with Rocket, who was not being especially cooperative. "...Well hey! Do you want juice or milk?"

The subject change seemed to work, as Rocket thought about this. "Milt," he answered at last.

"Well good! I'll just go get yer milk, then." He'd be fine for a whole minute, right? ...The Captain logically knew that SHOULD be fine, but he had also in the course of babysitting this child seen him produce objects that could not have possibly existed within a hundred foot radius in the course of just a minute or two, and had become increasingly convinced that children were magic.

Fortunately, he didn't have to debate it long as Ned soon returned, holding a small fake aquarium toy. "Fishies for Rocket!" he announced, first showing the toy to the Captain, then handing it to Rocket.

The boy looked it over, then smiled brightly. "Fish, fish~" he chimed, shaking the toy and watching the small plastic fish float around in the thin clear goo inside the tank.

The Captain smiled. "Nice job thar." Hopefully this meant he'd be happy for a bit, and would eat whatever snack the Captain brought as long as he didn't call attention to it. Maybe this weekend wouldn't be so bad, after all.

* * *

 

"Captain! Have you seen the news?" called an excited JJ.

"Which news be that?" JJ directed his attention to the large screen in the room, showing the latest information on Gargantua-2. "Aaaah. It's really comin' along, thar, ain't it!"

"Indeed! It's looking like I'll be leaving next week to start working on it personally."

The Captain clapped him on the back. "Well, congratulations, to ya, Chairman! Want I should break out the champagne so's we can have us a proper celebration?"

JJ laughed lightly, but shook his head and waved a hand dismissively. "No, no. No need for celebrations yet."

The small CEO stared at the screen before him, as if just taking in the reality of the progress. The Captain wasn't quite sure whether or not he should be saying something, but just as the silence began to feel awkward, JJ spoke, more somber than before. "At this rate, I just might… Well I might finish it before…"

Oh… The whole room suddenly felt a bit dimmer. The first diagnosis had been hard enough, but as they'd kept finding more and more wrong, the odds of fixing it seemed…

The Captain took a seat in the chair next to him. "Bah!" he scoffed. "The Jonas Venture I know could build a DOZEN space stations if he put his mind to it. Just the one'll be no problem." He wasn't trying to be dismissive, of course. Just reassuring.

JJ understood as much, and smiled. "Well I thank you for the confidence, Captain."

Looking back to the screen and a list of things that still needed to be done, the Captain asked, "So how long're ye thinkin' ye'll be gone, anyway?"

JJ sighed. "I'm not sure. I suppose it depends on how quickly I'm able to work." He leaned back in his chair, sprawling a little, tired. "I really do hate to leave Sally alone all that time, though…"

The Captain looked over this little man who'd changed his life, then up at the diagram of the space station, then back. Finally, he suggested, "Ya know? Why don't yeh take 'er?"

"What?"

"Well assumin' ya got the resources and accommodations fer it! And assumin' she wants ta go, of course." She probably wouldn't every time, if he had to make several trips. But it couldn't hurt to ask. And how many couples got to take a vacation to space? Even if it was a boring vacation where one worked most of the time.

"I… suppose I could ask?" JJ pondered it, rubbing his beard. "But what about Rocket?"

"Pff!" The Captain rolled his eyes and flipped a hand dismissively. "You leave the lad ta me."

"Are you sure? I could be gone for weeks on end! Won't that be a little much on you?"

"Naaahhh," insisted the Captain. "Asides, I got Ned ta help out. Between the two of us, it'll be noooo problem. -And speak o' the little devil!"

The two-and-a-half-year-old had just wandered into the room, dragging his favorite blanket with him. "Wha's dat?" he asked, pointing up at the screen.

"That's the space station I'm building!" answered JJ. "Do you remember me telling you about the space station?"

Rocket thought about it a moment. "Oh! Uh-huh!" He held up his blanket, pulling it taut to show the stars and planets and spaceships that patterned across it. "Rockets go space! And Rocket go space! Vrrroooom!" At that last word, he flipped the blanket over his shoulders like a cape and ran in a small circle.

Both adults chuckled. "That's right, wee man," said the Captain.

"Rocket? I'm gonna have to go to space soon.. Would you want to stay with your Uncle Captain and Uncle Ned while I'm gone?"

In response, Rocket climbed into the Captain's lap; reflexively, the man's hands moved to stabilize him. "Unca Capta fun! Unca Capta sin's son's an' we go fishin' an' gives Rocket cookies!" The Captain flinched at that last one, averting his gaze in a manner that only made him look suspicious.

JJ raised an eyebrow at that, but then chuckled. "In full disclosure, Captain? We do too sometimes."

The Captain felt… almost BETRAYED by this sudden knowledge, gaping at JJ in disbelief. "But she always says-"

"I know, and that's always the ideeeaa, but… Well, it's one of those things that's easier in theory than practice." He scooted over in his chair and reached over to ruffle Rocket's hair. "I mean who can really say no to this face?"

"Not me," answered the Captain.

"Me too!" Rocket tried to chime in, causing the adults to laugh.

* * *

 

"Captain, d'you hafta go?" asked the three-and-a-half-year-old.

"Aaaaye, I'm afraid so, lad. This is a really big day for Mr. JJ and yer mom, and I've gotta be thar ta help 'em out in what ways I can." It wasn't every day one could say they were opening the world's largest space station, or the first one ever open to the public.

"Yer the BEST helper!" Rocket insisted.

The Captain puffed out his chest and smirked, head held high but eyes glancing down at the boy. "I am pretty great, aren't I?" Rocket giggled. "Now, do you super proooomise to be good for this sitter?"

Rocket frowned and looked away, kicking his foot shyly.

"Oh, now what'sa matter, lad?"

He fidgeted a bit before finally admitting quietly, "But she's stranger…"

"Ohh, lad, nooo, we'd never leave ya with a stranger. She's a friend o' yer mom's. You've met 'er a coupla times before. Remember? That one nice lady who came ta yer last birthday party?"

"...Uh…"

The next five minutes were spent talking through reminders of who the lady was and how the next few days would go. By the time JJ and Sally arrived with the friend in question, he did seem to feel a lot better.

"Ready to go, Captain?" JJ asked.

The Captain's heart sank a little. He could tell how tired he was today. "Just about, Chairman," he answered simply.

"Thanks so much again for doing this," Sally was saying to the sitter. Kneeling down, she said to Rocket, "I just know you're going to be such a big boy for her, aren't you, my sweet little man?"

Rocket puffed out his chest and nodded firmly.

Sally said her goodbyes and gave her hugs and kisses. "Love you, Rocket."

"Love you, mommy."

Then JJ followed suit. Rocket was a few inches taller than him, now, so JJ stayed in his jetpack and hovered a little off the ground to maintain the illusion of being bigger when he hugged him. Something about the scene made the Captain's eyes water ever so slightly.

"We'll see you in a few days, all right?" said JJ. "I love you, son."

"Love you, JJ," Rocket replied.

The three began to leave the room- first Sally, then JJ, with the Captain bringing up the rear- but he was stopped by small arms wrapping around his leg. The Captain looked down at Rocket.

"Love you, Uncle Captain."

Smiling warmly, he leaned down and hugged the boy as well. "Love you, too, Rocket."

* * *

 

"Captain? Where are you?" The Captain jumped at the sound, startled out of his reverie. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to that nasally voice calling his name day after day.

"Hold yer horses, I be comin'!" he called back.

He looked down again at the photo in his wallet. Him, Jonas, Sally, and Ned, all framed around Rocket in the center at his third birthday party. Richard had even shown up to that one. He'd taken the picture. The Captain had to admit it was a very good one.

He thought not for the first time about quitting and going... "home". Going back to the island. Asking if Sally would even still let him stay…

This had been JJ's request, though. The Chairman knew the Captain could handle Ventech affairs, and had made it very clear he wanted the Captain to do whatever he could to keep the company alive, to do his best to help Rusty succeed.

The Captain didn't like it. He wondered if JJ would have changed his mind if he could see how the company was faring so far.

… He laughed softly, almost bitterly, to himself. Probably not. He always was an optimist.

JJ had changed his life. Had given him a real life. He owed the man this much, even if it meant waiting a little longer. Maybe even indefinitely.

"Caaaaptain, these meetings aren't going to schedule themselves, you know!" Rusty called again.

Sighing, the Captain took one last look at the picture before closing his wallet and tucking it away.

… Maybe… Maybe it would be okay if he just called, later...


End file.
